Children & Communication

Disputes over children are becoming more and more common as time goes on. The Courts have tried to combat this by insisting that for every dispute over children the parties have to attend mediation before they are able to turn to the Courts. Unfortunately, I find that clients who come to see me at this stage fall into 2 categories:

1. They just want advice before they tell their ex-partner that they are not happy with the current situation.
2. They have already told their ex-partner they are not happy with the situation which has already led to a fall out and increased animosity between them.

I find that if the parties fall into (1) above then mediation is definitely worthwhile and should be encouraged. Unfortunately, if it is (2) the majority of time mediation does not assist as the party’s communication has already broken down and they are unable to mediate over the issues.

Most arguments ensue because each party believes that it is their decision what should happen with the child and they fail to realise that it is the child’s right to contact with each parent. The Court will always allow sufficient contact with a parent unless that parent is a risk to the child.

If mediation does not work then a Court application is always open to the parties. I find that when Court attendance becomes necessary it can take a lot of work for the parties to begin communicating again. Furthermore, the decision in respect of contact is taken out of the parents hands and is put into the hands of the Courts. Not everyone is always happy with the outcome. It should be encouraged at every stage for the parties to try and agree what is in the best interests of their child. I find that if the parties can work together then they remain happier in the long term which will benefit their child.

This is why in most cases I always strongly advise my client’s to try and work it out between themselves first. Come see me for a free 30 minute appointment, take my advice and try and work it out between yourselves. Solicitor involvement should only be where all other lines of communication have failed.